Dave "Thunder Pants" Howland
  
Year: Graduated 2003
Age: He has a child. QED
Hometown: B-ton
Favorite TV Show: Carebears
Favorite Movie: Carebears go West
Favorite Book: Any "Choose Your Own Adventure"
Most Embarassing Moment: His birth
Spirit Animal: Bottle-nose dolphin and One-legged Kangaroos with surgically closed pouches
What he wants to be when he grows up: G&R revival concert host
Sign: No sign, he ran it over